I am so very slow about posting anything. I tend to shut down when I am overwhelmed. Overwhelmed is how I've been feeling for quite a while. My husband lost his job in September. We have both been looking for work and have both been discouraged. 4 1/2 months have passed. The severance package ends soon.
I know in my head and in my heart that eventually a job or jobs will come. God is an amazing provider. But living through the lack is challenging. I am having to trust what I know to be true but cannot see, hear, touch or feel. I feel vulnerable and exposed. I am scared. I wonder if I am being double-minded, how can trust and fear both live in me? I just keep taking the fear to God. Asking him to give me faith, to "help my unbelief." (Mark 9:24)
I read many blogs and Ann Voskamp's www.aholyexperience.com, is one of my favorites. Today she posted about "a life plan when you're overwhelmed." She referenced a previous post about a music competition and the wisdom imparted to her daughter when she muddled through a piano piece. That post is what prompted me earlier this year (month) to decide on a word of the year. Craig and I decided that our word would be FORWARD.
Whatever this uncertain year holds we will move FORWARD.
11 months ago